Download American Freak Show: The Completely Fabricated Stories of by Willie Geist PDF

By Willie Geist

“Willie Geist is one half Twain, one half Carrot best, components Heckle, and one half Jeckle.”
—John Heilemann and Mark Halperin, authors of Game Change

“I’ve learn laminated plane safeguard playing cards with higher highbrow heft. Turning critical: Willie Geist is the precise man to chronicle our decidedly imperfect times."
—Brian Williams, NBC Nightly News anchor and dealing with editor

In the hilarious manhattan occasions bestseller American Freak Show, Geist takes the clever, biting commentary enjoyed by means of his tv viewers to new satirical extremes. The real-life characters who now hang-out our day-by-day lives are forged as stars in thoroughly made-up scenes which are frighteningly on the subject of reality.

Geist offers us the 1st examine President Sarah Palin’s unconventional 2012 inaugural tackle, played live to tell the tale WWE’s Monday evening Raw. We move contained in the ballroom for a Dean Martin–style welcome roast of Bernie Madoff upon his arrival in Hell, with Pol Pot serving as roastmaster. George W. Bush’s batting-cage-and-waterslide-themed plans for a presidential library are laid out publicly for the 1st time. And new for the paperback variation, Geist places us within the room as Jesus joins fb, with the aid of a modern day messiah named Mark Zuckerberg.

From Obama to Oprah, Afghanistan to Lohan, Snooki to the Salahis, Willie Geist spares nobody as our host of this wild American Freak Show. You’ll snigger out loud whereas weeping for the way forward for the US.

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Lambert, The Experts: Mitch Bennett, Frank Peveler, Richard Hair, Kevin Jenkins, Simon and Farrah Gibbs, Scott Sanders, Brian Gadinsky, Tom Mazza, Lori Segal, Jethro Lieberman, Scott Studenberg, Mat Gordon, Alicia Curtis, Matt Stallworth, Tracey Redmond, Sarah Natochemny, Kirk Damato, Sarah Heiman, Brandon Rivera, Erin Anderson, Susan Surface, Jane Catflisch, Cameron Smith, Amanda Ezell, Alyssa Byrd, Harold Kramer, Molly Robertson, Seth Lieberman, Enzo Velazquez, Lauren Cofield, Nate Taylor, Vicki Lesiw, Bill Kramer, Clayton Hemmert, Craig Holzer, Sherri Margulles, Debbie McMurtrey, Fieldston professors: Sandra Cullinan, Bob Montera, Joe Algrant; Rolph Blythe, Irene Lacis, Andrew Nurnberg Agency, The Abner Stein Agency, CrewCuts, Kay Luo, Dave McClure, Anil Godhwani, Chesley Heymsfield, Stu Sternbach, Alex Finklestein, Stacey Soefer, Michelle Soefer, Dr.

Cow Tipping 29. Was It a Date? 30. Breakup 31. Airtroduced 32. Reality Show 33. Mechanical Bull Riding Lawsuit 34. Xtreme Date 35. Lapdog Date 36. Loud Bar 37. Best Friend's Dad 38. One Night Stand 39. Triple Indie Feature 40. Bad Playdate 41. She Didn't Shut Up 42. Meet My Homies 43. NASCAR/Secondhand Smoke 44. Arrives in Pajamas 45. Wedding 46. Date to Mate 47. Dim Sum 48. Car Ran Out of Gas 49. Wicked Cheap 50. Company Christmas Party 51. Your Date 1. Proposes on First Date Terminally ill or in serious need of a tax break, he pops the question.

Just kidding. " He never took his eyes off of you. Never. You now have to change your cell phone number and locks, just in case. 24. She Was Pregnant On her online profile she checked off A Few Extra Pounds. Unfortunately, Third Trimester wasn't a category. A free-flowing peasant top, drawstring pants, and sandals to accommodate her swollen feet. Nothing. Sometimes words are insufficient. "Want to feel him? " D-cup. She has twins at home. 25. The Dutchman Ladies, bring your checkbook. It's actually not so much that he's a spendthrift as he's a great believer in equality.

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